Questioning Cuddling Clues

sleepless nights with her.
mind wracked with thoughts and questions.
body wanting more.

Bitter Teardrops

rejected tears fall
down the cheek and on the floor;
destroyed peace of mind.

F.U.B.A.R. At Work

fucked up beyond words.
two-and-a-half hours wasted.
pointless anger lost.

Lunar Eclipse

shadow of the moon:
vision of light and darkness
cast down upon us.

Monday Blues

work week begins now.
mindless hustle and bustle.
surrounded by drones.

Relief Within An Empty House

break through and scream out;
empty the inner turmoil
within your tired soul.

ROAR

frus-tra-ted an-ger.
slow seething turned to dull ache.
exhausted energy.

The Workout Philosophy

physicality:
muscles. over-all size. growth.
strength. agility.

SRA: Sugar-Rush Addiction

mouth watering sweets.
hot or cold sugary treats
i need a fix now.

A Summer Time-Out

darkened skies breach peace,
soft mist drifts lazily down,
and sunshine's day off.

Once Upon a Time...

reminiscing of days of lore.
when times were simple, fun, and playful.
a gradual warmth takes the body.

nostalgia.
faded memories.
surreal realism.

Blood Hunger

sweet indulgence lost
upon humanity.
the decadent life force flowing
through the veins...
...flows elsewhere.
trickling down the bare flesh
and dripping down into feeding mouths.
drop
by
drop.
feeding frenzy.

teNO-lojick

the system is down.
mid-scan and poof.
system reset.
all work is gone.

in the age of technological supremacy,
life coexists with the beeps and lights.
sometimes, completely assimilated...

...but when IT doesn't work?
things slow down
and work is put on pause.

are we THAT dependent?

Baseball: A Player's Inner Dialogue

standing tall;
eyes locked on the target.
sweat beading at the brow.
what do i do?

swing? what if i miss?
wait? what if it's over?
should i take the chance?

no time to think:
let my instincts take over
and guide me.
no worries.

here it comes...
...
CRACK!
there it goes.
the crowd shuffles and yells.

that's game.

A Winter Question

baby, its cold outside;
are you warm enough?

An Unexpected Truth

truth is never pretty.
it comes at us unexpectedly.
but in the end...
it's worth knowing
what we never knew before.

Thoughts of You

its late at night
and im wondering, thinking, wishing
about how you are.

i miss you.
i want you.
i love you.

staring at your page;
listening to your song,
i wonder why we are
the way we are.

you're amazing and beautiful.
smart and sophisticated
(even if you deny it)
talented and petite
yet other-wordly in thought and soul.

i should be in bed
dreaming of you, us.
but i sit here awake
looking at this space
and listening to your song.
smiling.

i wish i could hold you now.
hear your breath as you sleep.
feel your warmth against me.
feel your twitches and kicks as you dream.
but most importantly,
i want you.

happiness just from your stare.
depth from your thoughts.
life from your soul.
love from your heart.
what more can a guy ask for?

nothing really.
cuz im content with everything
ive seen.
ive felt.
ive heard.
ive tasted.
ive inhaled.

more importantly,
im proud of you and of us.
im content with you and with us.
im eager for what the future holds.

im happy.
im in love.
and right now,
im teary eyed as i smile;
thinking of you.

life is an adventure.
and
life is beautiful.

i love you

I'll See You There

lets disappear to our special place
a place only you and me know about
where we can play and cuddle
kiss and make love
baby, lets disappear to our special place
where we can lay on the grassy field
and look at the clouds above
imagining what each cloud looks like
and pretending to be kids
let's disappear to our special place
where the black sands of a hawaiian beach
are beneath our feet
walking hand in hand
and listening to the waves
as the sun sets
baby, lets disappear to our special place
where our bodies become one
our eyes locked
and the sound of soft sighs fill the air
lets disappear to our special place...

Pressing Pause on the Remote Control

Sitting.
Watching the world:
busy, seductive, destructive, fun, nostalgic...
and then there's me:
pensive, NRG-etic, x-lr8-ed, confused, lonely, happy, still, d-e-s-t-r-o-y-e-d...

Is it really worth the wait?
To see everything and everyone move around you
so free, so happy, and so driven.
And feel alone and that life is on pause...
Can you answer me if it's really worth the wait?

If i'm in the way, i can just move...
...it's what i do.
Jumbled up in my confusion,
i can still see and feel something pulling me -> forward...
but why?

as if my tears can answer for me,
i wait again
for the next pull
and watch my life...
...pass me by...

will you stop and help?
help:
-me feel alive again
-see the light from this murky illusion
i want to...

Hollow Man

It hits without warning
and strikes harder than a head-on collision...
That Darkness, the debilitating Darkness,
sweeps through your body
and takes hold.

Before anyone notices,
they're gone
while you're left alone with the Beast.

All is robbed of you during this time:
-your happiness replaced with a deepened sorrow
-your senses sifted out while all that reamins is a dull ache
-your feelings washed away and leaving behind forlorn hope...

A bitterness grows as the Demon feasts...
Devouring on what was once full,
you're left at square one...
a hollow shell of your former glory:
You are empty.

The Reality Around Me

I SCREAM my lungs out,
but the haunting echo rings out
into the loneliness that surrounds me.
Is this real?
Or is this some sick twisted dream?

Why can't I wake up...
the darkness engulfs me and...
...goes straight to my heart.
Cold, empty, frozen, shattered...
what's left of my heart anyways.

Desperately searching for a light,
I find myself lost in today's random torment.
Acidic tears blur my vision further
as I struggle just to see something to reach for...

and reaching is what I'm doing.
I can't feel anything;
everything has slipped through my grasp.
Here I am:
alone and torn.
Lost and confused.
Destroyed.

Why is it like this:
loneliness clinging to me...
...a throbbing heart beat...
...a crying soul?

It's just all to familiar to me.
This lingering pit of cold sadness and fear.
An open wound gushing out all of my life
to be never closed...

Even my memory is starting to fade.
Where am I?
Who is that?
What is that?
and more importantly,
who am I?

Darkness surrounds me.
Is there no light?

Faded Hopes

I feel like I'm fading...
Am I worth saving?
Can I fit into this mold

of this lifeless body?
When I feel so shoddy?
Everything just feels so cold.

Despite this illusion,
I'm stuck in this confusion
of where I want to go.

Can you still see me?
Am I still free
with nothing to show?

It's just not fair.
Why do you care
when things don't feel right?

Is there a tomorrow?
Despite my sorrow,
I'll stop with this fight.

Just let me be.
Please, forget about me.
I'll keep on trying,

but it's not the same
when you call out my name.
I can't stop crying...

They feel like mace;
these tears on my face.
Will they ever stop?

I love you so much.
Yet, it hurts me such
to see we aren't on top

of this game called life:
Reality's strife...
things just fall apart.

I'll never stop loving you.
I don't know what to do,
but you'll always have my heart.

Hold it with care.
I don't have another to spare.
Just watch me fade.

Call of Anger

Like it matters
that my reality shatters.
My life maybe torn,
but a new me is born.

Built up rage
is released from its cage;
destroyed sorrow, ripped happiness,
warped confusion, accepted craziness.

Arise, my Inner Demon,
and tear up this omen
that I cannot control.
Take over my soul!

This weird twist of fate
I cannot create.
There is nothing from my past
that I will let last.

I will walk with an unbroken stride.
Strong and stubborn with no one to confide.
Head up, fists high, feet ready.
Spirit broken, soul crushed, heart unsteady.

My journey begins now and ends tomorrow.
Nothing exists outside of that.